Listen, I enjoy the salted caramel cold brew as much as the next person but I'm not gonna touch myself in the middle of a Starbucks over it.
Unfortunately that's exactly what a man in South Beach, Miami did. According to news reports the act itself lasted nearly 10 minutes! EXCUSE ME?
A customer, Alyssa Dimaria began filming and screaming at the man to stop. The busy Starbucks store seemed to be oblivious to Alyssa's cries for help. Eventually the cops were called, and that's when the suspect took off.
He tried dodging cops as we see in the video, but the South Beach Masturbator was absolutely no match for a taser gun.
The suspect was arrested for lewd and lascivious behavior. At his bond hearing, the suspect stated that he works on the beach...As if that somehow gave him permission to spank it in a Starbucks.
As for Alyssa she was unharmed, but says the event will always be in the back of her head.
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